Witty Quotes Haven: You Know You're Grown Up When..
1. | Your houseplants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them. |
2. | Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question. |
3. | You keep more food than beer in the fridge. |
4. | 6:00 am is when you get up, not when you go to bed. |
5. | You hear your favorite song in an elevator. |
6. | You watch the weather channel. |
7. | Your friends marry and divorce instead of "hook up" and "break up." |
8. | You go from 130 days of vacation time to 14. |
9. | Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as "dressed up." |
10. | You're the one calling the police because those #%$@! kids next door won't turn down the stereo. |
11. | Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you. |
12. | You don't know what time taco bell closes anymore. |
13. | Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up. |
14. | You feed your dog science diet instead of McDonalds leftovers. |
15. | Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt. |
16. | You take naps. |
17. | Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the beginning of one. |
18. | Eating a basket of chicken wings at 3am would severely upset, rather than settle, your stomach. |
19. | You go to the drug store for ibuprofen and antacid, not condoms and pregnancy tests. |
20. | A $4.00 bottle of wine is no longer "pretty good shit." |
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